When I had my hysterectomy, there were a lot of things I couldn’t do for
myself for quite a while afterwards. As your stomach and pelvic floor
muscles are damaged in the surgery, you really can’t lift ANYTHING for
the first 6 weeks. And I really mean that. Never mind hoovering (don’t touch
that thing for at least 6 months, if not a year!), carry groceries, lift
the laundry basket, or pick up kids. I well remember having to prepare
my then not-quite-2-year-old niece about the fact that auntie wasn’t
allowed to pick her up anymore. I well remember her throwing a massive
paddy about a year later, and picking her up onto my hip to get her out
of the situation with her yelling “Put me down! You have a poorly
tummy!!”. Clearly, I prepared her well. But because there were things I
couldn’t do, I had to ask for help. And as someone who values her
independence, that was really hard for me, but I knew that I wasn’t
going to get better if I didn’t ask for help.
This has not been a good week. I feel rather like I have fallen down the rabbit hole.
The steroids continue to wreck havoc with my head. The boredom of being off work is setting in. The insomnia is really beginning to wear me down. I haven’t had more than 4 consecutive hours sleep in more than 5 weeks. The mood swings have started bringing anxiety on that is almost worse that the “lows” that I swing down to. And at the moment, there is still no plan to move things forward to some form of treatment that will replace the bloody Prednisolone.
I have been very lucky to have found myself surrounded by incredibly supportive people through all of this. My friends, and especially my boyfriend, have been amazing.
When I hit some of those really rough patches this week, I could call, and someone came. I was rather a blubbering idiot this morning and one of my friends, who has her own health needs to deal with, drove all the way down here to console me on the sofa for a couple hours while I had a meltdown.
And she’s a good example of why it is important to build your support networks as well as use them. We actually met as a result of our respective hysterectomies through an online forum. Turned out we lived in the same town, and while I was in waiting list hell and questioning if I was making the right decision, she agreed to meet me for coffee and we completely hit it off and we became very close friends. Although lots of people were supportive, it was really important to have a friend who had “been there, done that” who could share her wisdom and encouragement. And that happened because I looked for more support.
The important thing is that you use it. Don’t be too proud to ask for help when you need it. Don’t be afraid to just tell people what’s going on. I’ve been amazed how many people I’ve told about being diagnosed with Crohn’s know someone else with IBD. And don’t be afraid to admit that you can’t do this alone. No one can.
I spent years before my hysterectomy suffering in silence with chronic pelvic pain before finally seeking support. That was my biggest mistake on that journey. I know better this time.
This has not been a good week. I feel rather like I have fallen down the rabbit hole.
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| Could someone throw me a ladder? Or failing that, some tools to start digging out some steps to help me climb out? |
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| I'd really prefer to be in the Difference Engine, like Ada. - Courtesy of http://sydneypadua.com/2dgoggles/ |
And she’s a good example of why it is important to build your support networks as well as use them. We actually met as a result of our respective hysterectomies through an online forum. Turned out we lived in the same town, and while I was in waiting list hell and questioning if I was making the right decision, she agreed to meet me for coffee and we completely hit it off and we became very close friends. Although lots of people were supportive, it was really important to have a friend who had “been there, done that” who could share her wisdom and encouragement. And that happened because I looked for more support.
The important thing is that you use it. Don’t be too proud to ask for help when you need it. Don’t be afraid to just tell people what’s going on. I’ve been amazed how many people I’ve told about being diagnosed with Crohn’s know someone else with IBD. And don’t be afraid to admit that you can’t do this alone. No one can.
I spent years before my hysterectomy suffering in silence with chronic pelvic pain before finally seeking support. That was my biggest mistake on that journey. I know better this time.
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